Where Are My Marbles?

I've been feeling lonely a lot lately. I'm always surrounded by someone, though, and that frustrates me. Yet, I feel like I never get any time with friends. I have friends, and most of them are very good friends. Buuuuttt, I never have time to see them. Why? Because every moment that I could be spending with them is also a moment that my future mother-in-law could be burning down the house with a hotdog in the microwave. I digress. So, yeah, on one hand, I'm lonely, but on the other... I want to fucking scream. I feel like I never have any peace. I'm always either around Adam (which I love, don't get me wrong, but sometimes I like space, too. We're always within a few feet of one another.), or I'm straining my ears to listen for something to go wrong with his mom, or I'm at work--where virtually everyone I see needs something from me. Maybe that's it. I always feel like everyone around me needs or wants something from me. As a server, it

So, living with a woman who is in at least the fifth stage of dementia can be...trying. Now, before I start this post, let me be clear: I am NOT upset that I am in this situation. I am NOT bothered by it any more than what is tolerable, and I do NOT intend any offense to anyone in any way. Okay, so, this just happened and it sparked a train of thought. It's late, but I haven't eaten (nothing new), so I decide to make myself some fries in the oven so that I can have a sandwich and fries. The beau asks for me to make him some, too, and I happily oblige. So, after having worked all day serving others food, I preheat the oven, get the dishes out of their hiding spots, grab the fries from the deep-freezer in the garage, and cook the fries. Then, I fix our plates, and bring him his. (He is in the bedroom playing his newest game.) I left my plate in the kitchen, seeing as I still had to make my sandwich, I love mayonnaise, so it had to stay by the fridge. I think, "What'

So, this is my second attempt at a blog, but perhaps it is my first real attempt. I sincerely hope that you like my posts and that I can pass on something to you that you can use. Well, the two of you who will probably ever read this. Regardless, I'm happy that you chose to click on this blog, and to read this post. So this is a pretty general "About Me," hopefully it doesn't bore you. I am male, 25, white, and gay. I live in Tennessee, U.S., with my black boyfriend and his mother. I know, sounds pitiful right? Well, his mother has dementia and we spend virtually every waking moment that we aren't working taking care of her. SO take your judgment and shove it somewhere unpleasant. You know, if you had them. I am a server, and I work at a local restaurant that has been around almost as long as I have been alive. When I was 17, my step-dad died and my mom went to jail for his murder. A couple of years later, Oxygen made an episode of Snapped about it. I'